I am not interested in a life where I hide from myself or the world. The truth is, though, I’ve been hiding my entire life. I’m not sure why - perhaps because I feel I don’t fit in with society, that there is something odd, or worse, weird about me … which there certainly is. Everyone is unusual - everyone is unique, that is to say, we live in an objectively heterogeneous world entirely, there is no ‘same’, except in the subjective sphere of our reality. Within that uniqueness though, people (and all objects) contain traits that are more or less similar to other objects, or objects of the same class.

And I feel that, in America in 2k18, my attributes tend to differ from the norm. Though I don’t like this either - a norm necessarily collapses a being into a single point on a 2 dimensional plane. To even consider that there might be a ‘norm’ is a profound and enormous assumption; to believe in it may be pure fallacy, superstition. Still, within collections (ok give us some guardrails) of individuals (let’s say - another guardrail - sentient individuals) some of those will act in ways that are more or less similar to others, or (differently) tend to act in ways that display preference to certain individuals or groupings within the community. And maybe there it is - I might feel that others have tended to not display preference to me, in spite of (because of?) my privileges. Or it could just be that I’m weird. Probably that. But I might be able to act in ways that are more or less weird - or convert it to odd, eccentric, even kooky - but not weird. That is why people might not prefer me and my ideas. Because I put them off by being too weird.

So then what is the difference between weirdness and oddness? Or eccentricity? The level of success you have achieved? The nature or subject of the actions that you engage in that make you weird, that are weird? Possibly …

I suspect that if I can figure this out … could be stylin soon.